Topic · The empty chair, being there, and what no one teaches you
Grief, loss and caring for someone
To love someone is to accept, sooner or later, the possibility of losing them —or of watching them suffer without being able to fix it—. These guides go alongside that: grief that has no deadlines, the empty chair, being there for someone who's hurting, and what no one teaches you about caring when someone you love falls ill. They don't come to console you with phrases; they come to make room for you.
- Grief has no deadline: the empty chair No stages to complete, no expiry date. Grief comes in waves, the bond changes shape rather than ends, and staying alive is not betrayal. Read →
- What your body kept doing afterwards What happens after a traumatic event — images that come back, startling, avoiding — isn't weakness: it's a body still on alert. What's expected, what keeps it going, and when to ask for help. Read →
- It ended, and nobody was the villain A breakup with no villain is grief too, even without a funeral or permission to be unwell. Why it hurts in the body, what quietly prolongs it, and what actually helps. Read →
- Nobody says how they died The question with no answer, the guilt that reviews the past, and everyone else's silence. Why you get less support than other bereaved people — it's measured — and what actually helps. Read →
- There was no funeral, and someone is still missing No funeral, no leave, no condolences — and someone is still missing. Why this grief hurts differently, what the figures nobody quotes actually say, and why your partner seems to carry it another way. Read →
If you want to go deeper
Living with the absence. A free email course to accompany grief, without deadlines. See the course →